A new schedule

So I feel like I'm a bit behind, but I think that's because a lot of stuff has changed over the last few weeks:). Nathan is toddling all over the place, the little cutie - oh how I love that first month when they are learning how to walk! Those unsteady little steps with their hands in the air - cute as can be! His favorite thing to do is go play in the basement. He is always standing by our basement door, banging and yelling, wanting to go down. He still doesn't know to turn around and back down stairs when he's at the top, so I can't give him free reign of the house yet. I keep showing him so I'm hoping that he will catch on soon. He has discovered pressing the pause button on the washer, so that made my laundry day interesting yesterday. We have started reading him books before bed and it's really cute, he points at things and looks up at us and grins . . . so nice to see him be so interactive:). He hasn't needed much sleep lately which is unfortunate for us (as much as we love his little voice, hearing it at 6:15am is not such a treat!), but he is also cutting his third molar in two weeks so that might have something to do with his sleep not being stellar. Hoping to be done with molars soon so we can have a little break before the eye teeth start! Last teether, I can make it!:)

Adam's home program started last week Wednesday! His aide's name is Samantha and he is starting to warm up to her! It took a few days, I wasn't allowed to leave the room for the first few days, but he is now comfortable alone in a room with her while I'm somewhere else for a while so that's good. The other day, I was in the shower when she came, and Adam didn't like that so much. He went into Brian's office and looked right at him and asked, "Where's Mommy?" and did not break eye contact until Brian told him the answer. Those kinds of moments are surreal for us, as he doesn't ask us questions! It might be hard for parents of typical kids to imagine what it's like to have a kid that talks a lot but doesn't really communicate, but this is a great example of something that we never see - a question asked of us! So happy to see that he is expanding his communication to the point of asking questions, even if it's only when he's stressed (for now). He has been asking me for things properly the last few days, too! I was sharing on the previous post (or the one before) about how he would say "Please Dad" but never "Please Mom", well the last few days, he's been saying it:). I love to report on the things he's doing well, because goodness knows, we still have a lot of struggles, too! The kids have been going outside the last few days because the weather has been beautiful, and trying to get Adam to come inside . . . it's a tough one. Today was better, so I'm hoping we don't have a repeat of the meltdowns of yesterday afternoon:(. Focusing on the positives:).

Lynsey has been crying a lot lately, causing us a lot of frustration. We feel like she can do better, and needs to learn to react a bit better. I made her an "Anger Wheel of Choice" last week, which is basically a poster board with a number of acceptable alternatives to crying and whining when she gets upset about something (I took pictures of her doing some of these things, like punching a pillow or lying down in her bed to put on the board and made a spinner in the middle, too). She really enjoyed doing it, and while the novelty is wearing off a bit, it has helped us through some crises! Hoping it continues to work for us, because I am ready to lose my mind with the crying. She is such a great little girl, helping me so much with both of her brothers, taking on a ton of responsibility that we often don't even ask of her! She will get through this phase, we just need to help her through it.

Some of you might be wondering how I feel about someone coming into my house 4 mornings a week and being in our space, and I have to tell you the preliminary results are in - it's been great! I actually thrive on a little bit of structure to my life - someone coming over almost every morning at 9 means I have a reason to keep the house in decent shape, and we have even instituted a nightly "clean the playroom" ritual before teeth-brushing! I have wanted to do that for so long but just never bothered, and the kids are great about it! Lynsey actually likes to do it, and nobody really messed up the playroom yesterday so we skipped it, and she was asking me about it! I like that I now squeeze in my work out before she comes so I can shower and be ready when she's there, giving me more time to just sit and play with the kids. She was here for the Easter party I had with my mom's group friends, and it was so nice to have someone helping Adam through some of his stress with all the people, and not letting him just avoid everyone to cope. He was around during the egg hunt, although didn't really try to find the eggs so much. At least he was present! We would like nothing more than for him to start joining in on some of these fun activities. The other kids love Samantha, too - she even brought stuff for dying Easter eggs yesterday! Adam wasn't interested, but Lynsey loved it haha! So far, it's been a great thing, so I'm hoping that it will continue that way:).

Nathan is finally walking AND we're getting Home Program for Adam!

Well, at the ripe old age of 12.5 months, Nathan is finally walking well:). For the last few weeks, he had basically stopped walking. Any time we let go of his hands, he just dropped down to his knees and crawled. It was this way up until today - suddenly, he was walking! Like everywhere! He still likes to grab onto things for support, but he's turning himself, toddling all over the place:). I kind of thought it would be this way, that he would suddenly decide to do it (since he's known how for a few months already!).

We took Nathan's soother away a week ago. He did pretty well with it, I think he's forgotten about it already. I do feel a bit bad for him because he's been cutting the top two molars over this last week - one is almost all the way through, one is about half I would say. He's doing really well considering. Naps are terrible, but how different is this from before? He has been getting up really early though (I blame the soother being taken away, because the other two kids did the same thing for the first while after losing their soother). Thank goodness for springing ahead or we would suddenly be 6am risers!

Another big thing that happened last week! I got a call from the LEAD Foundation. I had called them only the week before to get Adam on the waiting list for Specialized Services (basically a Home Program where an Aide comes into our house to help us out, and we get home speech and occupational therapy as well). I was under the impression that this would start in the summer at the very earliest, likely only in September. Well, on Wednesday I got a call that a spot had "somehow" opened up in the Northwest in the mornings and that Adam was the next one up for it! This is completely a God thing and I give Him all the credit for this, because this really should not have happened. We were on the list for a week! Sooo thankful! They are starting this Wednesday, and we are going to try four mornings a week to start. If I find that it's just too much, we will scale down to three, but we want to try and get him as much help as possible. Every now and again, it sounds like he's answering a question, so we are hopeful that with some extra help, maybe he will become conversational soon! So I will let you all know how that goes:).

Lynsey got her first report card last Wednesday. Her teacher, who has been out for over a month, wrote it. It was actually better than I expected based on our last parent/teacher interviews. She was mostly in "meets expectations", with 6 or 7 "exceeds expectations" and only a few areas where she "needed help" meeting the expectations. They were "how to be in a community" and "taking responsibility". Both areas that she actually does very well in at home, so I'm not sure what she's doing at school?? I'm taking it with a grain of salt based on our previous interactions with the teacher and taking the good away from it:). I talked to the substitute that has been teaching Lynsey while her teacher was away, and she had lots good to say about Lynsey! She said she does tend to zone out sometimes, but she thought the reason was because she was really bright and needed to be challenged more. She said that when she upped the challenges for her, she responded much better! Maybe her regular teacher should take a page from the substitute's book and she would be less frustrated with her:). All in all, we think she's doing great in school and should be just fine.

No one under 1 in this house anymore:)

I hate to be a complainer, but can I just say that every time blogger attempts to make some improvements to their photo uploader, they cause me more grief! How hard can it be with the technology that is available to make a good photo uploader! I have tried to upload my pictures in chronological order, but the wonderful collage they put together has them a bit jumbled unfortunately. Sorry - my rant of the day, over now:).

Our baby boy celebrated his first birthday last week! What an occasion for celebration! I hate to make this about me, but the fact that I survived this last year is something worth noting:). He absolutely loved his cupcake and cried when it was all gone, poor baby:). He is blossoming into a fun, curious, social little toddler. In the last few weeks, we have seen a big increase in his babbling, pointing, showing us things. . . he has even started bringing us books! We remember Lynsey doing these kinds of things, but Adam never really did. I hate to analyze everything Nathan does, but naturally we are hyper-aware of all the things he should be doing to see if he might be falling into the category of possibly having Autism as well. At this point, we feel like he is typically developing, but only time will tell for sure. He's crying less and just a lot more fun these days, which is so nice. He was pretty high maintenance for a while there! I did see one point of one of his molars poked through the other day. Yes - 1/16th of his molars down, 15/16ths to go! Okay a bit depressing when I put it that way. But it's a start! I have also been working on helping him go down stairs, and today, he went down several stairs on his own! Soon I won't have to have a heart attack every time he makes a move towards the stairwell:).

Lynsey has been so responsible lately! This morning, I was being lazy in bed and I heard her get Nathan out of his crib (yes, she drags him up and over the crib railing and it doesn't seem to bother him). She brought him downstairs and apparently fed him his breakfast. She also made toast for Adam (although later I found out she was so busy getting breakfast for her brothers that she forgot to eat herself:). She is just jumping right into that Momma role lol!). She has been offering to help clean up, and she is getting really good at remembering to put her backpack and winter clothes away when she gets home from school. I'm really proud of the way she is, really quite on her own, taking initiative on a lot of these things. Another perk to having an independent, capable child! They put their mind to it, and they can be a huge help! We love that little girl:).

Adam has been fighting me to get on the bus the last few days - very weird! Never happened before - he has always been nothing but thrilled to get on the bus before. Apparently once the bus goes, he's fine, and he was fine at preschool yesterday, too. I have to remember that every child has good and bad days. The problem is when Adam has a bad day, it is quite bad. I want to mention that the "Open pwease Kywa" was NOT a one time thing, and he does it regularly for his preschool teachers, and now for Brian as well. He will not do it for me. I have been trying to enforce that he needs to use my name and ask me in his "happy voice" if he wants something, but it just seems to agitate him more. He does do it for Brian after a bit of prodding, but he still has never done it for me. I think part of the reason he's had a rough few days is because I am trying to get him to do this, and he does NOT want to for some reason! I am stuck between just letting up on it and continuing to push it, because he has shown that clearly he has the ability to properly request things from other people. It is hard, because as much as you have to "pick your battles" (and with Adam, they really are big battles!) I feel like letting him off on this one is sending him the message that he doesn't need to respect me the same way he respects his teachers and his dad. I don't know . . . I'm so tired of the screaming and just want to give him his granola bar already! I've said it once, I will say it again - parenting (especially parenting an Autistic child) is not for the faint of heart! But we'll figure it out:). This morning was already a lot stressful than yesterday (up until he got on the bus anyway).

"Open Pwease, Kywa"

I mentioned on facebook yesterday that Adam had taken his cheese string over to his teacher and said the above three words: "Open pwease, Kywa". I don't know if everyone understands why this is so significant to us, so I'm doing a blog post to break it down:).

"Open"
The fact that he is starting to ask for things to be opened is a big step for him. We have been working on this for a long time! More and more instead of being frustrated when something isn't accessible, he is learning that he has to ask.

"Pwease"
How many people are working daily with their kids to have them learn manners?? Goodness knows we are still working on this with Lynsey! The fact that Adam used the word "please" is a sign that he is paying attention to the PROPER way to ask:).

"Kywa"
And last but certainly not least, he used his teacher's name (well, her name is Kyla - "L" is a hard one to pronounce:)). This is the biggest deal in this whole thing! How I have tried to get him to use the word "Mom" when asking for things! He has never done it for me, but I am still over the moon that he is doing it with SOMEONE!! He is starting to connect with people and learn the right ways to get people's attention!

So while many people may have seen that status and thought, "oh, wow - so he asked for someone to open his cheese string", it was a lot more than that for us. We pray this is only the beginning and that there will be many more instances of "Open pwease, Kywa" in his future!

Home again, home again:)

We are back from our weekend in Seattle! It was such a nice getaway - a break very much needed. The days leading up to the trip, we spent a lot of time cleaning and getting everything ready (even hired cleaners for the first time in my life for a few hours on Thursday - they did a great job:)). We left Friday morning and one of the girls in my youth group at my church came to babysit. Brian's parents got there around 7pm to take over for the rest of the weekend. We were thankful to have such competent help with the kids, making our trip a lot more relaxing:).

So what did we do? Not a whole lot! We actually stayed in Bellevue, a mini-city right beside Seattle. We ate at some fabulous restaurants, did some shopping, went downtown Seattle and walked around, drove around a bit . . . it was a pretty relaxing weekend. We actually went to see a movie on Sunday night! No kids, why not??:) Weirdest thing, someone was there with a baby! At an evening showing! Never encountered that before. He/she was crying during the previews and you could see a lot of people looking at the very conspicuous couple. I didn't feel sorry for them, though - you can't take a baby to a movie unless it's a special Stars and Strollers showing! Everybody knows that! Maybe this is an American thing?? Anyway, it was a nice weekend and everything went well at home, except that Nathan was sick and didn't sleep all that great (I'm guessing Grandma and Grandpa probably weren't as heartless as we are and actually went to comfort him at night, which I'm sure he loved:)).

Another thing we did while we were there was check out some preschools. We are in such a weird position of Brian not even having a job down there yet, but having to line up a good preschool for Adam since there are waiting lists! We feel pretty good about one place in particular, and she is great about our situation and would even be willing to let us reserve a spot with a small deposit if they decide that Adam is the best fit (there are a few other kids also vying for this spot). After spending a weekend there, I have decided that I could learn to make it my home the same way I learned to make Calgary my home. It would be different and there would be a big adjustment period, but it's not like I'm living in a comfortable small town right now - am I really that much more comfortable with Lynsey going to the school down the street here than I would be the school down the street in Bellevue? There are a lot of questions to ask, but for now, Brian is going to apply and see if any opportunities arise. People have asked me if I would be disappointed now if things didn't pan out and we had to stay, but I can honestly say I wouldn't be. It's not like we have a bad life here that we are trying to get away from! If nothing opens up for us down there, then I will accept that as a closed door and we will stay here and be just fine with it:). So we'll see what happens!

Blogger has changed the way you upload pictures so everything is all messed up - I'll figure it out soon I'm sure:).

Almost break time!

Looking through the pictures I took over the last few weeks, I think to myself that I should pick up my camera more. I do have some super cute pictures of Nathan standing naked by the ride on train peeing on the floor, but I have a no-naked-bums-on-the-blog policy. I think the kiddos will probably thank me for that one day:).

Things have been pretty normal since the last post, nothing really out of the ordinary. We are getting ready for our trip to Seattle this weekend and I'm starting to get excited! I feel a bit nervous about leaving the kids, but I'm just trying my best to be as prepared as possible so the care-givers don't have too many things to worry about other than just watching the kids. I am hoping to be able to do some shopping while we're there, so we'll see what I can find:). So looking forward to a weekend away with Brian!

Nathan had a little tumble down the stairs the other day - it wasn't too serious, but Brian ran over to the stairs saying, "Oh no! Oh no!" and then caught him about halfway down. He was a bit injured so he cried for a little while, but recovered. A few minutes later, we hear Adam sliding on his stomach down the stairs saying, "Oh no! Oh no!" and then when he got to the bottom, he started fake crying. Clearly he was re-enacting the scene with Nathan, and I don't think I've really seen him do that before. It was interesting - he did it several times over. We kept trying to tell him that Nathan was hurt, Nathan was sad, etc. but he doesn't seem to have any understanding of other people's feelings. We will keep trying to tell him about them and hopefully it will start to click so he can have some empathy!

Nathan is really holding out on this walking thing! He is as steady as any of our other two kids were at this age, but he is still not loving letting go of our hands and walking off on his own. He does let us walk him with only one hand now, which he wasn't doing a week ago, so he is progressing! I will be happy when he figures this out, because as much as I love him, I am ready for him to be a bit more independent. He also wouldn't sleep this morning so he only had one nap today . . . think I might try one nap for a few more days to see if he's ready to consistently only have one nap. The other two kids were a bit older when they did that, but Adam did go through a few weeks around when he turned one where he went down to one nap and then went back to two for another few months, so who knows! These kiddos are always changing their sleep patterns - he's been sleeping 13 hours at night lately!

Lynsey is such a little girl these days. Today we were at the grocery store and we ran into a boy in her class (one that she talks about quite a bit as well:)). She was so shy, I swear her cheeks were pink for several minutes after! The other day, Nathan almost rolled down the stairs but she caught him at the last minute. At first, she was very apologetic, saying "sorry" several times, but I told her she saved him from rolling down and that she did great. All of a sudden, her demeanor changed to being all humble and she shrugs her shoulders,"Well, it was nothing, really". She has such personality that little lady! I love how much responsibility she takes for both Nathan and Adam - she was made to be an older sister!

February already . . .

Here we are on February 1st! Winter is almost over and it is +5C here in Calgary today! I have already forgotten how cold it was earlier in the week - I so love the Chinook winds that we get here:). Let's hope it stays out of the -20's for the rest of the winter.

Adam had an eye appointment on Tuesday morning. Some of the people that know Adam well will know that doctor's appointments cause him a lot of anxiety (and really, by saying that, I am putting it quite mildly). We haven't had a successful appointment for him in a very long time (since before he understood what was happening!). I prayed and prayed all morning, since I was the lucky one that got to take him (he seems to be the most relaxed when he's with me, so I get to be the one who does these things with him!). I literally prayed for a miracle because I knew that the likely outcome would be that he would scream and scream and there would be absolutely no way the exam could be performed. We have no reason to believe that his eyesight is bad, but it's important to get his eyes checked regularly because it's not like he would be able to communicate to us if he wasn't able to see properly. Well, we got there, and his very first reaction when we walked in the door was to turn around and tell me that he wanted to go back to the van. Somehow I convinced him to come sit with me and finish his toast. It truly was a miracle, one that I was so hoping for but really didn't expect! I could see on his face that he was a bit stressed, but I was actually surprised at how little stress I felt from him. He allowed the eye doctor to look in his eyes at first from a distance, but after a few minutes he actually came right up to him with a light, and Adam allowed it! I could not believe it! God is so good, and I give Him ALL the glory for this miracle. I felt a super natural calm over Adam, and I knew God was with him, helping him cope. It put me in the best mood all day, too! Just knowing that he is learning to manage his anxiety already . . . it continues to give me so much hope!!

We also went to tour a different preschool this week, the Providence campus in Beddington. He did so well on this tour as well - new situations do not throw him into the same tailspin that they did even a few months ago! We are seriously considering this option for him for next year, as it is a lot closer to home (only a 7-10 minute drive) and actually, bussing would be free for us instead of $240/month. Something to consider! Obviously if we didn't think it was a good program we wouldn't consider it just to save a few bucks, but it seems like it would be a good place for him. New Heights has been great for him and we love his teachers so much, so we are thinking we might reserve a spot in both to give us some time to decide. I am happy we have two good options instead of none!

Nathan is not walking yet, but has started to crawl on his hands and knees more! This kid is doing things completely on his own timeline:). He cruises along the walls until he get to Brian's office and if the doors are closed, Brian can hear him pushing on the door and after a few seconds he starts yelling, "Da! Da!". He loves being in Brian's office - so many papers around to mess up! He loves playing with balls, and one of his favorite games right now is throwing a ball, crawling after it and throwing it further, crawling after it again. So cute! We love this little guy:).

Lynsey has started saying that she wants to cheer for the Flames. She claims because she is growing up in Calgary, she wants to cheer for the team that her friends cheer for. I think she sees that we don't like this and is pushing some buttons, but it is quite worrying to me. Brian says we should not make a big deal about it, and I agree, but I told her I am drawing the line at buying her Flames clothes! Not in this house! She still likes Ryan Jones so there is hope, but I have to face the fact that I can't control her. Apparently our brain-washing power over her is over and we need to move on to more impressionable subjects - Adam and Nathan, you're up!:)